Guilty And Gallantly
by you.broke.a.promise
Summary: Harry's stuck on some depressing thoughts. There's no pairings in this one. SPOILERS FOR THE 7TH BOOK. DO NOT READ unless you want SPOILERS!


1**Title:** Guilty and Gallantly

**Warning:** If you don't want spoilers for the last book, Lucky Number 7, Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows, DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER. I have completed the book and there may be spoilers! So don't ruin it for yourself by reading my mush!

**Distribution:** Ah, Rach's terms. Well, they're on my bio, and they're the same for all my work work meaning fanfiction/poems not actual work cause work isn't enjoyable and I find writing the exact opposite of work!.

**Disclaimer:** HARRY POTTER is owned by J.K. Rowling, who is now (might I add) the richest woman in England. She's richer than the Queen! I'm not kidding!

**A/N:** Here's mah Harry Potter one-shot I promised y'all. I've been mercilessly working on my SasuSaku stuff, including Stand My Ground. But I'm getting virtually no where, so here we are. I enjoy Harry Potter thoroughly and I wish I was married to Daniel cause he's just that cool! I read his bio and I think we're rather alike. And what's age anyway!? He's only three years older than I am! SO WHAT? He's an amazing person, and I hope he lives up to his full potential, not just HP movies, even though I love them so. ;) The first scene is a little like one of the beginning scenes in the 7th book with Harry cutting himself and all, and I didn't do that on purpose, but whatever. By the way: this is just me rambling. It may make NO SENSE.

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"Arrrgh," Harry muttered, pulling his hand back away from the broken glass on the table. He turned quickly and shoved his hand under the faucet.

He'd been dwelling on the ending. His ending, really. He had been ready to die for those he loved, and he had been ready to end it gallantly. But Dumbledore had spoiled it all, telling him he hadn't died and such. True, it had ended much better the second, no third time he'd gone through it.

Getting hit with killing curses seemed to be his kind of thing.

Though Fred, Lupin, Tonks, Mad-Eye, Snape and countless others had died for him (well, Snape had really died for his mum) they had done it gallantly, so why couldn't he? What happened to 'Neither can live while the other survives'? He had killed Voldemort twice (technically three or four times) once as a baby, a rejected killing curse sent back, and once as an eleven year old who had the nerve, and the bravery to go up against a teacher (or two) just to defy the bastard that had killed his parents. His innocent parents.

It was really all that man's fault. And his own.

Guilt. It was all that was on his conscience lately.

His parents wouldn't be dead if they'd just let Voldemort kill him while he was young; he wouldn't have known the difference. So many lives could've been spared if his mum had handed him over and picked up her wand. If only...

So he was stuck there: dwelling. And as much as he tried, he couldn't get off it.

"Eh, Harry?" Said boy looked up to meet the face of his best friends. Ron had a worried look in his eye and Hermione looked puzzled.

"Yes, Ron?"

"Are you okay, cos it seems like you're not... and you're bleeding."

"Let me see," Hermione demanded, her wand already out to heal it.

"It's fine," Harry insisted, avoiding their eyes, "Did you need something?"

"Harry," Hermione said, ignoring his last comments, "We're your friends. We know you. What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he said, staring out of the window, watching George and Mrs. Weasley sitting on the swing in the yard, George had his arms around her in a consoling sort of way.

But everything was wrong. It was his fault that George had only one ear. It was his fault that Fred was dead. You can't just grow up with a twin and then have one die and expect it all to be like it was! And what of Lupin, Tonks and Mad-Eye? Lupin and Tonks had a new born that suddenly was parent free. Oh, and did he forget to mention that since he was technically of age, the baby was his responsibility (not Tonks' mum's) because he was the God Father? Oh yes. Plus, Tonk's mum had lost both her husband and daughter to the same cause! And Mad-Eye, he was a great asset to the Order, and he was a treasured friend. A powerful wizard.

And Sirius! Sirius didn't have to die that day; Harry had ignored the Occlumency lessons and scummed to Voldemort's vision!

His parents wouldn't be dead. Neither would Cedric or Colin.

And his dad's whole group; including his mum and Snape. Everyone was gone. And it was his fault.

Wormtail, Sirius, Remus, his father, Snape and his mother. Everyone who could still be happy, (well maybe not Snape and Wormtail) and they could be living. But they weren't.

He could've just died.

And he could've, and he should've done it gallantly.


End file.
